Sex for One

by Kim Allen

Masturbation is one of the most-practiced but least-talked-about pleasures of life. Did you know that well over 80% of people (men and women) say they have masturbated? Considering how taboo it is to admit that, one can imagine that the true percentage is even higher.

On this web page, we will not pretend that masturbation doesn't exist. We will not perpetuate the silly untruths that surround this perfectly normal practice. We will not gasp in shock, squeal with embarrassment, or frown disapprovingly.

Let's start with what masturbation isn't. It isn't evil. It isn't a sign of repressed sexuality. It isn't a "vice." It isn't a last resort that you turn to because you can't get "the real thing." It doesn't indicate mental illness or moral weakness.

In fact, masturbation is just different from sex. The sensations are different, your method of stimulation may be different, and of course the psychological feeling of it is different (since you are not with someone else). It may be easier or more difficult to achieve orgasm through masturbation than during sex with a partner. Self-stimulation may be a satisfying substitute for sex; it may be a supplement to your sex life; or it may not fulfill all your needs. Anything goes.

If you're curious, why not just try it? There's no "wrong way" to do it, any more than there is a "wrong way" to feel happiness. It's your body-- that means it's yours to touch without shame or guilt. No one else can know exactly what feels good to you, so you get the benefit of having exactly the right stimulation. For me, this is the key advantage of masturbation, and because of it, I can reach orgasm much more quickly than during sex with a partner. And I can keep going after that...

Once again, there is no wrong way. Some women use dildos for the feeling of penetration, and others prefer no penetration; some use vibrators (inside or out) for extra stimulation; some use nothing except their own fingers and hands; many simultaneously fantasize about anything they find sexually stimulating. Clothes on, clothes off, toys or not, what matters is that you feel sexual pleasure. Masturbation is a little nice thing you do for yourself, like buying an ice cream cone or taking an extra fifteen minutes to sit in the sun at your lunch break. And it doesn't cost anything!

You can find more information at this site.

And here's a survey to fill out (or just read what other people said about masturbation)!